HAPS members are individuals who are committed to teaching and want to inspire a love of the subject matter in their students.  Teaching is not easy, and there are times when aspects of the job can drag us down.  And then there are the times that reinforce our commitment to the discipline, and remind us why we decided to become A&P teachers in the first place.   Last Thursday was one of those times for me.   It was my last day of teaching medical Gross Anatomy for the semester.  Right as class was to begin, one student stood up and started reciting the following Ode.  Another student stood up and took turns with the recitation.  Turns out that each student wrote a portion of the ode in the form of a haiku, and it related in some aspect to anatomy, or specific class, or our humorous discussions during lab dissections.  The writing is both humorous and touching, and it is a memory I will never forget.  Thank you, Class of 2016!  Below is the  (G-rated/edited) version of the ode:

Odes to Our Gal Val

A Truly Motivating

And inspiring prof

 

Odes inspired by

Our leader on this Journey

Of Anatomy

Embryology

How worthless you are to me

F&#% F#*% F#%*#$ F#%*#$ F#$*% 

 

Our overflowing

lacrimal fluid, floods our

nasal cavity

  

Pick my pimply face

Kenny Loggins’ Danger Zone

Thrombophlebitis

 

 Winwood so bellows

with a guttural roar from

deep in the pharynx

 

 Fore!

 

Henry Gray’s wisdom

You taught me, what to avoid

Pick a zit and die

 

Five

 

Insidious Loops

And, convoluted pathways

Just to work some glands

 

 Like Cincinnatus,

Your willing accomplices

We absently learn

 

While painting pictures

Mind’s eye wanders to Flesh, Bone

One grows, accustomed.

 

 Here’s a scary thought

Without it I’m one ball short (LANCE)

gubernaculum

 

 To be so rigid

surely a covering you are

a very tough mother

 

 Moist muscular walls

Between, like kids in the hall

food slides down the gut

 (get your head outta the gutter)

 

I hear “katydids”

When you explain flow to brain

Tell Willis he’s bugged

 

 Sir Fickle’s Fast, yeah?

So many layers to know

Another way to die

 

 In and out I slide

Sometimes deviating left

With nerve XII damage

 

 Fingers in my nose

Epistaxis ain’t so bad

I can’t stop, won’t stop

 

Arytenoid muscles

Contract, I whisper to thee

My perineum

  

The periphery

Only canthi, can’t thee see

See me, mon ami

 

 Presbyopia

You’re only twenty-seven

Between you eight eyes

 

 Val loves Family Guy

Oculomotor breaks, Now

she watches the floor

 

Cranial nerve one

Soiled socks smell like lilacs

Schizophrenia

 

Without you I think

Its better to not exist

Lacrimal secrete

 

 We try to find nerves

A tireless search, finding only

Abominations

 

Valerie is nice

Thanks for answering questions

outside of class time

 

 Alien in me

Moves with my every word

No talking for me

 

 Pupil dilation

Melatonin on the rise

Go the f*#$ to sleep